Do you ever feel invisible?


Zdieľam texty z newslettrov Claire Zammit, ktoré ma zaujali.

I'm writing today about something incredibly personal and vulnerable that I experienced before I discovered Feminine Power.

For years, I struggled to get traction in my own career, and to impact others with my gifts.

I'd launched my coaching practice and was offering workshops, only to end up coaching people without charging them and begging my friends to come to my events because only two paying participants had enrolled!

I didn't feel that what I had to contribute was seen or valued by others or by the world, and I was deeply confused as to whyin spite of my intelligence, hard work and commitment-I wasn't having more success or being offered more opportunities.

I deeply sensed my own potential to teach and to serve, and when I would go to conferences and events, I'd hear the speakers share their ideas and I'd have a knowing that I, too, had something valuable to contribute.

I also doubted myself and feared that maybe this belief was a bit arrogant because I hadn't really had any external validation that it was true.

It was just a knowing I had inside me.

I wanted to express my voice and yet I was constantly victimized by the belief that no one really saw me.

I had the whole story figured out about why I wasn't getting the opportunities I so desperately longed for.

But then, I discovered one of the key principles of creating from Feminine Power:

Before moving into action, first, identify and release your inner barriers to receiving what you desire to create.

As a result of this practice, I was able to identify the specific ways I was showing up that were actually the source of my experience...

And it was nothing short of a revelation.

OMG, I could instantly see that I wasn't getting the opportunities I wanted because I was actually disappearing myself!

It turned out I had a core belief that I was essentially invisible, and my way of showing up was that I would disappear my own thoughts and feelings, and just mirror other people completely.

Whenever I was with another person, they wouldn't be able to see me, because they were simply have a deeper experience of themselves in the mirror I was holding up for them.

No wonder I was creating this chronic experience of invisibility for myself everywhere I went!

So after working with these Feminine Power practices, I was able to get connected to the truth of who I was, I took responsibility for showing up in new ways that were reflective of that truth.

And the truth was that I do have valuable contribution to make.

The truth was that other people can't know my feelings, needs and desires unless I share them and make them visible.

I'd spent my whole life waiting to be discovered-waiting for other people to find their way into my world and intuit the value of what I had to contribute, and then respond to my needs and desires.

So to break through this inner glass ceiling, I gave up this old way of showing up and instead took responsibility to begin to presence myself in all my relationships and in the world.

I took the weaker part of me that had been stuck for so long and connected it to the deeper part of me that knew how much I had to offer...and I became responsible for generating my own visibility.

And then a really wild thing happened...

A few weeks later, I was hosting a dialogue series-our first "Women on the Edge of Evolution" conference-and the first person I had to interview was Dr. Jean Houston, co-founder of the Human Potential Movement and a truly amazing woman.

I was so in awe of her, but I knew my challenge was, as always, to show up in ways that were consistent with the truth of who I was.

So that meant letting go of my old way of playing small and simply mirroring people to try to please them.

I knew I had to be a gracious host, of course, and offer some of that mirroring and reflection, but I also needed to be fully engaged in the dialogue as my complete empowered self.

About halfway through the interview, Jean said, "Claire, I have to speak to you privately tomorrow. Call me on my private line."

So of course I did, though I was a little nervous as I dialed the phone.

When she came on the line, she proceeded to reflect back to me what she'd seen during the previous day's interview, and it turned out that she'd really seen me.

She said "Claire, you have a great destiny, a great calling of leadership in the empowerment of women, and I want to support you and stand with you. Come visit me in Ashland."

So I did, and she proceeded to share with me a much larger vision for me than I was able to see or hold myself at that time...

Then she opened up her rolodex and called and emailed every powerful, influential woman leader she knew and encouraged them to join me in the "Women on the Edge of Evolution" conference.

And out of that, the platform for Feminine Power expanded as I created my company, Evolving Wisdom, that has led to greater and greater levels of impact and contribution, reaching millions of people.

All of this was generated out of that moment when I brought who I truly was into alignment with how I was showing up in the world... and everything changed.

Now, it's your turn.

I couldn't generate my visibility, my contribution, or my impact from inside my old pattern, and neither can you.

And what's at stake in breaking through these barriers is nothing less than your entire life and destiny.

If you're struggling to create anything in the domain of the feminine (those things that are not predictable or controllable such as love, connection, creativity, higher contribution, impact, belonging-the things we're most yearning for!) your primary obstacle is not outside of you, it's within you.

It's actually a core belief you hold about yourself, about others, and about the possibilities of your life.

This is your inner glass ceiling.

And unless you learn to break free from it, no matter how hard you try, you're not going to be able to succeed.

I'll explain why in just a moment, but first, I have a question for you:

Who or what are you blaming as the reason you can't be successful in particular areas of your life?

I've polled the women I've worked with over the past several years, and if you're like 85% of them, you're blaming your circumstances (even though you might know better!).

You say to yourself: "I don't have enough time, I don't have money. I don't have enough education."

"There are no good men out there."

"The economy is bad."

"People don't want to spend money on coaching services."

And while there might be some truth to these external constraints...

You're never going to find your power by blaming your circumstances.

14% of the women I polled knew there was something internal that was creating their experience, but simply blamed it on some psychological shortcoming.

When you're not successful socially or professionally, maybe you say things to yourself like, "I just have low self esteem."

Or when you sabotage yet another relationship opportunity, you might think, "Oh, there are my father issues or my mother issues coming up again."

Many of us kind of know where our patterns started and explanations for why we have many of the issues we do, but none of that analysis allows us to to liberate ourselves from those limiting patterns and issues.

The bottom line is that you're never going to find your power by blaming your psychology, either.

The truth is that life isn't happening to you, even though this is perpetually how it feels...

Life is responding to you.

Your core beliefs and assumptions about who you are or what is or isn't possible, create the ways you show up in your life day after day.

And you are probably showing up in ways that generate evidence that reinforces the truth of these stories.

Life and other people don't mirror and match your beliefs, they mirror how you show up.

The problem is that in the areas where you're struggling to be successful-love, creativity, career-you're actually showing up from the parts of you that are wounded or stuck in these old stories of your powerlessness, non-possibility and limitation.

You can't attract love on top of a deep, inner sense of being unlovable...

You can't generate success on top of a deep feeling of being unworthy...

And you can't make an impact on the world if you secretly fear you have nothing worthwhile to contribute...

There's absolutely no faking it, and here's why:

Because inside these old beliefs you will interpret and respond to events inside these filters.

You might respond by making bad decisions, repelling people trying to support you, missing opportunities right in front of you, over investing in the wrong things and so many more unconscious behaviors that create evidence for the truth of the old story.

The foundational practices that we work with in our upcoming Feminine Power Essential Course for the Awakening Woman support you to forge an unshakable connection between the weakest part of you-the part that feels powerless and is stuck in these old stories-and the part of you that knows better...

The part that is wise...

That has access to resources...

That has perspective...

The part of you that can show up powerfully for other people and offer support, counseling and insight.

When you discover how to make the connection between these two parts of you, you'll effortlessly be able to show up in ways that are aligned with a deeper truth about who you are...

And once you do that, your "inner glass ceiling" will completely shatter!

Within a matter of weeks, your life can begin to completely reorganize and other people will begin to reflect back to you the strong and capable person you truly are.

And it will be a little shocking at first, because you'll realize that the old story you've been carrying around for decades was never even true.

This is one of the KEY shifts in your orientation to the process of creating and manifesting with Feminine Power that works at the level of self-actualization.

Why Personal Power is a Myth

If you're struggling to manifest and create the things that you most desire-or to get to the next level of your impact and influence in your life...

It might be because you're suffering from a "support deficit."

Find out with this reflection exercise!

1. Think about an area of your life that you most desire to manifest in such as your love life, prosperity, career, health, finances, etc.

2. Reflect on the current obstacles you're running into and any challenges you're experiencing.

Then reflect on the following questions:

1. How many other people (especially other conscious, caring women) in your life know about your desires for success in this area of your life and are standing with you in your vision?

2. How many others know about the struggles and challenges you're facing and are supporting you to overcome them?

3. How much support have you been willing to invest in to create a break-through?

If you have lots of support and resources, then congratulations, you're a role model for Feminine Power and are on your way to success!

But if the answers to any of those questions is "not many..."

I want to invite you to begin to be curious about why.

Chances are that you're like most women and have internal barriers to receiving the level of support you need to truly succeed, and this can manifest in the following ways:

You don't want to appear weak, inadequate or needy.

You don't want to go into receiving "debt."

You don't want to burden others with your problems.

What has your story been about receiving support up until now?

In our masculine culture that celebrates the power of the individual, we've been led to believe that we're weak, inadequate, or somehow flawed if we can't gain mastery over our lives by ourselves.

The real truth, however, is that we need support from others, especially other women, in order to thrive and come into the fullness of our power.

So, today, I want to validate the deeper knowing you may already be sensing without realizing it:

At the level of destiny and self-actualization, personal power is insufficient.

The truth is: you can't fully become yourself by yourself.

Becoming yourself and making the greatest difference with your gifts is a team sport, not a solo race.

Most of us have spent decades struggling in isolation, trying to break free from old patterns and launch our creativity into the world.

Even though some of us have supportive friends and family members, our inner experience is that we're alone and our full flourishing is a personal problem we have to tackle by ourselves.

And what's even worse is that we beat ourselves up for not being able to do it alone.

What if your challenges in realizing your own potentials weren't caused by any personal inadequacy, but rather were the result of not having enough support in your life from which to thrive?

Did you know that geese flying in formation can fly 70% farther and at a much faster speed than they ever could alone?

And did you know that a recent study in Princeton, New Jersey, has shown that when committed groups of people set intentions together, they're six times more likely to manifest what they're focused on?

It's only by coming together with what I like to call "Power Partners" to feed each other power and to support one another to step into our larger destiny, that our lives are able to flourish.

Release the 3 Hidden Power Blocks

If you're like millions of women in the world today, you feel a deep yearning for something-and it's more than just success, in the traditional sense.

You feel a higher possibility in your relationships, your health, your career, your calling, the expression of your creativity...

I call this that your yearning for your destiny.

It's the destiny of an acorn to become an oak tree.

It's the destiny of a rose seed to become a rose.

The yearning that we're having is not just for success, it's to actualize our highest potentials.

But why do we so often feel blocked or stuck when it comes to our destiny?

The reasons you've been struggling are likely not what you think.

In my twenty years as a coach and mentor, as well as my decade of doctoral research on women, power and self-actualization, I've discovered that millions of women are being held back by invisible and unnamed barriers that the majority of personal growth work, spiritual practice and traditional coaching do not identify or address.

1. Shame: an underlying belief about WHO you are that limits your power and potential in a given area of your life, e.g. "I'm not good enough, I'm too much, I'm not valuable, I'm not seen, I'm not safe,"...

2. Lack: a feeling of being disconnected from a higher power and the support of a loving universe that's organizing around your success. This can cause the experience of deep insecurity, fear and scarcity, and a sense of it being too late, or that there's not enough, or the need to control things to feel safe...

3. Isolation: even though you're a caring woman who gives a lot to others, you likely feel alone when it comes to manifesting the deeper yearnings of your soul and igniting the higher possibilities of the woman you sense in your clearest moments you came here to become...

These invisible barriers are embedded in, and reinforced by, the Masculine Power system that's operating largely outside our conscious awareness and manifesting in very specific, tangible ways in KEY life areas.

Even the most accomplished and gifted among us are held back by these hidden barriers-these old stories about our lack of value, feelings of being unsupported by a higher power and the false belief that we need to know all the answers ourselves to be worthy of having a voice and taking up space.

And those of us who might not identify as being accomplished may feel like we're not enough or not valuable as a result of having prioritized caring for our families or our spiritual and personal development over material "success."

I can't underscore enough how critical it is that you identify and release these blocks and barriers-it will be difficult if not impossible to manifest your potentials at the level of destiny without doing so.

You can't step forward into your higher purpose on top of an old story that you're not good enough...

You can't transform your health and become radiant, vital and alive on top of a belief that other people's needs have a higher priority than your own...

You can't magnetize the resources you need to unlock your genius and gifts and make a prosperous living on top of a feeling that life doesn't support you...

And you can't make the leaps that will have you on the course of your destiny and service to the world at the highest level if you believe you need to do it all by yourself...

The good news is that once you can pinpoint the exact way these blocks are showing up in the areas you're creating in, it's astonishing how quickly you can break free from their grip...

...and tap directly into your Feminine Power so you can step forward into the larger life you sense is possible!

If you're trying to manifest anything at the level of destiny such as a loving relationship with a soul partner or lasting health breakthroughs it's pretty much impossible to do on top of these old beliefs...

You can't step forward into your higher purpose on top of an old story that you're not good enough...

You can't transform your health and become radiant, vital and alive on top of a belief that other people's needs have a higher priority than your own...

You can't attract a partner who's a true equal on top of a belief that you're not valuable unless you are giving more than you're receiving.

My leap of faith...

časť z newslettra


You're being called forth to a much higher possibility.

Your struggles only exist because you're being activated and ignited to reach higher and express more of your potentials...

If you're struggling with finances, it's not because you can't just get a job-it's because you're seeking a way to make a living aligned with your values.

If you're struggling with relationships, it's not because you can't find "someone" to just procreate with-you're wanting a much greater possibility of intimacy with a true soulmate-someone who can "meet you on all levels."

If you're struggling with health challenges and self-care, paradoxically it may be because your circle of care has expanded beyond yourself and even your family, to our larger world, and it's hard to know how to prioritize meeting all the needs you're serving.

If you're struggling to find your purpose, it's likely because you have so many gifts and options, that you're actually here to participate in creating the future and creating something higher. And the context that would need to be for you to fully become yourself doesn't yet exist. You're here to create it.

And the reasons you have been struggling to step forward into these possibilities are not what you think they are.

At this new level of self-actualization, the masculine system of power doesn't work, which is why we feel powerless to create the things we're now most yearning for.

None of these things can be created exclusively with a power system that's based on control and analysis, and logical, linear thinking, nor can they be executed with a step-by-step strategic plan.

To create at this level, we need another system of power-a Feminine system-a system that's intuitive, creative and magnetic, and which enables us to create those things that can't be created solely through strategic thinking alone, or managed and controlled using a step-by-step plan.